Four letter word for NOT YOURS

This conversation most likely did not happen:

Neighbor A: Look, someone ordered the NYT delivered to their home.

Neighbor B: It was not me. Was it you, Neighbor A?

Neighbor A: It was not me. Since it was probably not Neighbor C who is clearly out of town this weekend, it must be the newspaper fairy who just randomly drops off expensive weekend editions to people who may want them but don’t pay for them.

Neighbor B: Must be. Happy reading.

Why steal my paper? Why?

UPDATE: Apologies if my sarcastic reenactment is confusing.

Someone took my Sunday paper. It ticked me off. End of story.

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